Her love language

In my recent session at a Parenting Course by Niki and Sila Lee, we talked about our children's love language and how we can fill up their emotional tank by identifying their love language.  There are five categories - touch (hugs and kisses), words (affirming and assuring), time, presents (need not be material, but something that means alot to them) and kind actions. 

For Victoria, I noticed that her love language has been consistent over the years, and they are kind actions, time and presents but not necessarily in this order.

Love Language - Kind actions

First scenario

Two weekends ago, Vic wanted to prepare me some snack for teatime.  So I suggested a slice of bread.  This little girl excitedly took out all the ingredients and told me not to look.  I didn't, and went on my work.  Soon she told me to close my eyes which I did, and then presented me with a plate of a bread sliced into halved (to make the square eyes) and a lining of what looked like raisins to create a smiley mouth and nose.

She asked if she could have one raisin, and I gave it to her before I took a bite of the bread.  Suddenly Vic gave a squirmy face and spit out pieces of the raisin.  I thought the raisin went bad, and quickly took one to taste myself.  It tasted sourish and weird!  Eeeeeeeuuu!!!   I took another look at the little black stuff on my plate and asked Vic where she took them from, because they did looked a little too smooth skin for raisins.

She then brought out the remaining packet of my preserved black beans and we both had a really good laugh!!!  Hahahaha... she had mistaken my preserved black beans for raisins!

Second scenario

One morning, I was rushing for time and yet baking her a special experimental salmon filling bread, Vic offered to help.  So I told her to prepare a slice of bread for me with kaya spread.  I emphasized and reminded her that I only wanted ONE slice as I didn't have the luxury of time.  She assured me that she will keep to the brief but told me not to look.  I was hoping she was not up to any surprises again, because I really needed to just gobble my breakfast down, finish my baking then rush off to pick William.

True to her word, she prepared me ONE slice of bread with the kaya spread that I requested, but also stuffed in pumpkin seeds and raisins and whatnots in between.  Oh dear... I had to really munch and crunch and chew on that one slice of bread.

So my conclusion... she love me greatly!  She's creative in her own ways, and follows daddy in his show of love for me in this aspect, because she and hubby tend to overdo a simple gesture.   


Love Language - Time

Vic adores her Daddy-Victoria day out even if it's just half an hour to pick up some groceries, or like her recent trip with Daddy to the barber's which she also had her fringe trimmed.  Unfortunately we don't do this regularly but only as and when we can.  I guess she just want to have a parent all to herself without William or anyone else.  With me, she enjoys a trip out to tapau food and I noticed how happy she was whenever she can join me at the shopping mall, just she and me.


Love Language - Presents

And of course, which child at her age would not like presents?  William does, but not as crazy over them as his sister.  He doesn't get all excited over party packs like the sister (who would announce and open them the moment she gets into the car) and Vic used to, and continues to like buying little surprises.

There are so many memories of her buying a bun, or an ice cream, or a packet drink, or burger for me, since she was younger and remember her first purchase with her first pocket money this year? She bought an eraser for Daddy and a ruler for William.

The way a child shows love and care to others is normally how she would like to be loved back in return.  I find this so true here, as Vic also likes to receive little gifts and surprises from us.  These may not be material or expensive, but just to a gesture to show her that we were thinking of her.  Of course, my natural worry is if this love language will result in materialism in the little girl, but the course says it's all about balancing the other love language.

So there!  I got the first steps now, which are identifying Vic's love language, the next step is to use them to refill her emotional tank.

While you were away, honey...

... the night before you left, I showed you another blood vessel that broke in my left eye, leaving it quite a bloodied, scary sight especially when I looked one corner.  Since there was no itch, no pain and no discharge, I didn't see the doctor again - as you know, I'm not keen on seeing any doctors unless it's really major.  As for the stubborn cough, it seemed to have decreased quite a bit now that I'm consciously spitting them out instead of swallowing them back. 

... i get a little tired from all the extra driving (picking, sending, marketing, meeting appointments), but this is considered peanuts compared to the hundreds of kilometres that you have to drive during your trip away. 

... the evenings especially were really quiet without you around.  On the second night, Mama Yeh Yeh paid us a surprise visit which made the us really happy.  They each got a new bag from their grandparents too and me, a set of beautiful stainless steel bowls from their recent holiday.

... William as usual have been happily drawing away, practicing and refining (somewhat) of his art skills.  He has drawn more ducks chasing sharks (complete with gills and dorsal and pectoral fins) and started to draw ladybugs too (inspired by the floormat).  He's kungfu-ing a lot as well, doing flying kicks in the air, punching and slicing and whacking make-believe opponents.  It's quite funny to watch him, actually, as he'd suddenly launch into an attack during meal times, or after lunch, just to shack of the extra energy, I guess.  I tried to video him a few times but he saw me and scampered into hiding.  He's getting camera-shy these days, sigh... a phase I hope he outgrows quickly.

... after the two weeks school break and exams, Vic is coming home these days with more homework.  Poor girl have to finish off her homework after dinner and bath and sometimes ending at 11pm.  She's tired by then, but I insist she packs her bag.  Once or twice I've helped her packed her bag out of sympathy, though.  In the mornings, your little princess can snooze all the way past 10am if we don't stir her up.  Oh, and your girl have learnt to sms as you can see from the two messages she sent to you (all typed by herself with her choice of smiley faces).

... the kids were generally well behaved.  There was no major incidences where I had to use reinforcement from our "friend" hanging in the kitchen.

... the night before you returned, I asked the kids to pray for your journey mercy.  As I sat there on the bed waiting for them, there was no response.  The girl was busy pedicuring her toes, and the boy was obsessesed with a new Dr Seuss' book that I brought in earlier.  So I switched off the lights without any warning, and told them to return to their beds, and to make them feel bad, I said my own prayer ALONE and ALOUD.  Five minutes after my Amen, Vic apologized first followed by William and they both came over to pray for you.  How sweet of them.

... I've won another round of Monopoly with the ipad after many defeats, and I'm ready to re-match you anytime when you are ready.  Ahem!  This time, learn to trade, ok?  Oh, and I polished off a packet of Twisties just in case you're looking.   : )

... and we survived yet another round that you are away... AND now that you're back, we're all looking forward to a weekend together with fun and catch-up rest! 


Happy weekend to everyone!

Friends that disappoint...

Vic has learnt to share about incidents in her day without much probing, well, some of the time, but considered an improvement from those days when she was so secretive. 

Some weeks back, she told me that she was really upset at the friend in school.  Vic forgotten to bring her color pencils to school, and the natural thing to do was to ask from the girl next to her.  The girl strictly said no, and told her to borrow from someone else.  In all Vic's 7 years, we have always emphasized the importance of sharing, especially between William and herself.  I guess Vic was really shocked, and if I recalled correctly, she said she asked again but the girl still refused to lend her color pencils. 

Yesterday my daughter shared with me in the car on the way back home that she and a few other classmates have been personally selected by their class music teacher to represent the class for a singing competition.  As this is Vic's first time and she's by nature a very shy person in public, Vic said she was not keen.  Immediately her buddy told her, "if you're not keen, just tell teacher you don't want... just say you're scared!" but that didn't sound like what a real buddy would say, did it?  Because you see, her buddy was not in the selection, and being the more competitive one between the two of them, I sense a little jealousy and sour grapes coming from the other girl.

Later, Vic told me that her music teacher asked her to sing in front of the class, which she did after bucking up her courage.  I really applaud her for doing that because I know how shy my little girl can be.  But before I can open my mouth, Vic said that her buddy started laughing at her when she was midway singing.

Some kind of buddy, right?!  But you can argue that they are only 7year olds, so they wouldn't know how to "behave" themselves, correct? 

Still... I sense Vic needs a lot of encouragement and assurance.  I told her to go for the competition, because if her teacher feels she is musically inclined, then why not try? If don't win, at least gain the experience.  No confirmation from her yet, so we will wait for updates from Vic if she's joining the competition or not.  For me, I can only tell her to do her best, don't let others demotivate her just because they are not picked, and that Mummy Daddy and her family are very proud of her. 

Day 2 & 3: Cameron Highlands

3rd - 4th June 2012, 
Cameron Highlands

It's been sometime since I last took some really good pictures of nature and the kids but the recent holidays allowed me the opportunity to stock up my photo gallery again. Here are some...

Look who played with his breakfast?  The toast was actually for me, but I was already stuffed, so hubby had to wallop it himself.  Breakfast selection and quality was average. 

Holding hands... walking back to our room after a filled tummy

Kids are always happy on the playground.  Strawberry Park has a unique all-wood playground right in front of our penthouse.  The kids only enjoyed this for a while...

One of my better shots of the happy 4yo.  He is always moving around and it's hard to get his cooperation for a good photo.

We spent sometime at this multicrop place where there were lots and lots of cactus on display and for sale.  We bought two pots of multi-hybrid cactus (one sitting in my bathroom now) and another big flowering cactus for myself.  I hope they don't die on me, like the last one which I kept in my office many many years ago.  My fingers are so un-green that even a money plant has died on me, but as you see, I'm moving on... hopefully these will prove to be fruitful investments

Roses, roses... I love 'em all

Snapped this strawberry seller on ipad from the car, as we inched our way up to Rose Garden or was it Kea Farm?  Around this area there are many stalls selling fresh produce and all souvenirs, so shop to your hearts' content!  Prices are already cheap, so no point pressing any lower, but just a hint... you may get away with some freegifts (which I did... so proud of myself because my haggling skills is only 101 level)

Pardon my ignorance... it took me awhile to realize that these are mushrooms!  Quite interesting...but we didn't stay long

Just Vic and I went into the Rose Garden... they charged for entrance fee!  Vic seemed to love this place, leading me through the flowers and bushes, and sportingly posed for pictures

The pose was my idea... not very good, eh?  Hehehe

We visited a bee farm too... admission is free, unlike the rose garden.  A little education for the kids here but I think Vic expected to see a real beehive!

My lunch - good ol' chinese food, but not cheap though, it cost RM5 for this - tourist price la.  But I'd like to note that the stall owner was a very kind lady who suggested we sit inside her other shop away from the satay smoke, and she quickly opened up a new table and put up chairs for us.  In fact, we find all the locals very friendly - at first I thought it was just the hotel staff, then the local sellers, the food stall owner, pasar malam folks.

But food in CH is not cheap.  These 4 dishes here (claypot beancurd, local green vege, venison and petai)  cost RM58 for such small portions!

I'm amazed at how this si tau learn how to sit like this, with one hand immaculately placed on his lap while enjoying his sweetcorn appetizer.  The sweetcorn is soooo sweet, we can even eat it raw. 

The second morning - weather was good and we are checking out soon after breakfast, just in case of another traffic jam heading downhill.

Vic with her new sunglasses.  We were looking for one in PJ to replace her old one which is now tight, and the prices ranged from RM15.90 to RM30 with designs which didn't quite pass my personal liking (read, easily outdated)... and guess what we found in CH, a simple black with bling blings on the side, costing only RM7!

The traffic was surprisingly smooth on the way downhill eventhough we left nearing noon.  I guess all the cars left the day before (Sunday).  We had no plans to visit the tea plantation but since we passed one ie Bharat Tea Plantation, we stopped and allowed the kids to take some pictures and pluck some tea leaves - oh just for the fun!  They were more adventurous than we thought, wanting to walk down the hilly laterite slopes, but we had to move them along...

Smile, boy boy!

And how can one visit CH without stopping at the waterfalls along the way?

End of holiday...

A holiday up on the hills...

I didn't plan much for the kids during their two week school break.  Initially wanted a few days back in Seremban but their cousins contacted HFMD so we have to postpone the trip.

Photos extinct with the dinosaurs

I brought the kids to see some dinosaurs on display at the National Science Museum along Jalan Damansara the other day, but as I was downloading the recent holiday pictures into my laptop awhile back, I accidentally deleted some of the dinosaur pictures.  Aarrrggghhh!!!  So heartsick!  All those lovely pictures.

Vic was scared of the dinosaurs (she would not even stand near them by herself), whereas little brother William showed no fear and was totally fascinated.  He saw some naughty kids touched the dinosaurs and followed the same, despite my warnings to him.  We saw different dinosaurs, but don't ask me their names because I'm not a dino fan.  We spent some time downstairs where the kids played the indoor playgym.  Before going home, Vic said she wanted to see the dinosaur displays again - this time she showed no fear.  Some of the science displays were spoilt - kaput - hardly interesting to me or the kids. 

For a total of RM33 in entrance fees for the three of us, the 1.5hour trip was quite worthwhile eventhough the dinosaurs were not much to shout about.

Here is one of the few precious photos that was not deleted:

Cameron Highlands
Saturday, 2nd June 2012

A different kind of jam

We started our journey at 9am, anticipating some holiday heavy traffic but what we experienced was far from what we anticipated.  The jam started immediately after the toll then cleared off a bit before swelling up at the food to the hill.  From then on, we inched forward round the bends.  We haven't had lunch, although the kids did munch on some home made garlic bread for their breakfast in the car.

Gastric

After a toilet break and joining the jam again, the kids were very quiet in the car, too quiet until we have to keep asking them if they were ok.  We were not even near Ringlet (the lowest town) when Vic said she had tummy pain in the middle abdomen which means she was having gastric.  With no other food except the bread, I told her to take some but she refused.  Then I made milk for her with William's milk formulae but she refused to drink, and needed a lot of coaxing.  She didn't want to eat too and continued crying.  Poor girl.

Stuck in an inching jam with a girl having gastric and the nearest civilization some kilometres up the hill, I was silently blaming myself for choosing Cameron Highlands.  We prayed.

Vomit

As if having a child with gastric pains is not bad enough, Vic later told us that she felt like vomiting but did not want to.  Quickly, I grabbed the plastic bag from behind my seat and opened it for her, at the same time chucking Heh Heh away from her. 

Vic vomited and William coughed and looked as if he was about to vomit too.  I was sitted in front and immediately wondered how I am going to manage with two vomiting kids!  Thank God William's vomit-like cough was a foul play.  Hubby managed to find a safe place to stop opposite the road.   It would have been silly to keep the vomit with us for the next few hours until our destination, so we did the most natural thing which is to bless the plants there with Vic's vomit.  : )

The Lakehouse

Passing The Lakehouse, hubby decided to stop.  It was around 1pm then and we were not even at Ringlet yet.  This was such a good decision because the kids got out for some fresh air, walked around and we ordered Sausages and Mash and Asparagus Soup.  The price was super pricey too, but we had no other choice.  The portion and quality for the food that we ordered - not worth it! 

Managed to get Vic to down some soup and mash potatoes, and we also gave her an oat biscuit which she would normally not be able to take because of the ingredient contents.  But at times like these, heck the diet and save her tummy!

At The Lakehouse

The Smokehouse

We joined the jam again, and the next stop we made was at The Smokehouse where we ordered lunch.  The prices here was even worse, it was daylight robbery.  I remembered the cheapest you find on the menu was poultry at RM48 and other main course averaging around RM70.  No choice too, so we ordered a Chicken Maryland and Lamb Chop.  Whilst waiting to be called when the food is ready, we joined some other patrons at the garden, happily snapping pictures with the lovely landscape. 

Am I thankful to see my little girl smile again after the initial gastric scare in the car

Ahh, they can be so sweet and loving at rare times like these...

If no garden and flower, you won't see me smiling like this... hehe

It's so hard to get him to pose still for the camera, so this is one of his cooperative shots

Healthy Strawberry Farm

Still stuck in the jam but very near to our resort, we saw a strawberry farm and thought, why not?  So we turned in, hoping to get some relief from the horrible jam that we've "tasted" from the beginning of our journey.  Some refreshing strawberries would be nice... ahhh, but we weren't the only one to think this.  The parking area was packed and one would have to be a good "parker" to be able to squeeze in.

This is the first time the kids saw how strawberries are planted, not like they were interested anyway.  Haha..  But it was here that they bought their little cactus and picked their first souvenirs.  Daddy pampered himself with waffle sandwiched with ice cream and strawberry filling, and we bought strawberry jams.

Showed the kids how strawberries are planted

Hubby and I enjoyed a waffle with ice cream and strawberry filling

Vic was sad when she saw hubby and I eating the waffle.  So a little photo to cheer her up. 

Worker holding two pails of freshly picked strawberries

The pink one belongs to the girl, whereas the boy picked the multi colored red-yellow because it had 3 babies.  This was initially Vic's choice and William wanted the same - specifically with 3 babies - but since we couldn't find a similar one, Vic gave hers up for the pinkie

Strawberry Park Resort

We FINALLY arrived our destination at 4pm.  Hubby checked us in.  I was expecting a Deluxe Suite, but hubby surprised me with a Penthouse!

The dining area with a fully equipped kitchen

The work area

Vic is fond of checking out the complimentary stationary in the hotel room

Look!  A jacuzzi!  Can I have one of these in our house?

The kids' room - good thing the twin beds are joined together.  Comes with attached bathroom

The living area.  In the background is the dining table.  

Still oohing and aahing as the kids and I checked out each room and section of the penthouse, hubby directed us to yet another surprise...

... the birthday cake!

Opening ceremony with the jacuzzi.  To say the kids loved it is a total understatement.  They spent easily 30minutes to 1 hour here on their own.

At 6pm, I put both kids to nap in their own rooms.  They've been briefed that they will be sleeping together without mummy daddy that night.  I'm not sure if this was a good time to start as they have never slept without us before, moreover their room is across the living hall from ours - at the other end of the Penthouse.  But it would be silly for 4 of us to cramp into one bed when there's two other beds available, right?   

At 7pm, we went for our pre-booked steamboat dinner at the Resort's Thai Restaurant.  William couldn't wake so we bundled him onto the stroller and carried him up and down the stairs at the lobby and going down to the restaurant.  

The place was full, thank God for reservation made during our room booking.  Even with that, we had to wait for close to an hour.  Vic was getting hungry again, and Daddy took the initiative to buy some grilled fish and fried rice for me and Vic from another restaurant to "ding ji tou" (tahan stomach) first.  

Our steamboat arrived nearing 8pm.  Half way through, William woke and joined us.  

It was a nice walk back to our hotel room after dinner.  We had a simple cake cutting / birthday song after dinner. 

Getting my birthday kisses from my two little darlings

 

One for the album... would have been perfect if we could find a place to set up the camera so Daddy can be in the picture with us

 

Upon Vic's request to go out for a drive, we took a night drive, joining some hundred other cars heading to Brinchang town.  We chanced upon a night market about to close, and did an impromptu stop.  Here, we bought wild honey, hair accessories and another fridge magnet for William.  Things are really cheap, and bargain may prove futile as the local sellers will not reduce price any further. 

Another surprise came our way with the hotel staff coming by to light up the fireplace.  Hubby and I played Monopoly on our ipad, with William teaming up with hubby and Vic with me.  I like Monopoly better on ipad because of the no hassle and no worries on distributing cards, picking up and looking for dice, counting money, etc.  

We had a lovely time playing monopoly in front of the fireplace

The game was later hijacked by the two kids but hubby claimed he won.  ; P 

Kids went to bed after a story book.  Weather dropped to 16deg at night according to the thermometer in the balcony. 

More pictures of William the Mad Hatter

Continued from previous post.
 

After snack, the kids from each class lined up to take a class picture on stage, and also to show off their costumes. This I have preempted William and told him to just bear with the whole costume for that 5 minutes, don't take out his wig or throw it around. You never know what this playful boy can be up to, if message is not drummed into his head.

So obediently he followed his friends up stage, and smiled for Teacher Vincent to snap the official class photos. Then he came back down and whilst waiting, I decided to wipe off his face paint since it was nearing dismissal time.

Next thing I knew, the teacher announced his name as Best Dressed for his class, and I told him to quickly put on his wig, hat and jacket again. William was obviously confused and rather upset. He asked, "Mummy, why have to go back up again? Why have to wear again?" Teacher Poh Suan quickly explained that he had won a prize and told him to hurry hurry upstage. So William my boy, so obedient went back up stage, for another photoshoot.

And you would have thought that the little Mad Hatter would remember his manners... caught here using a satay stick to dig his teeth, and his wig playfully placed ON TOP of his hat

In the car, he referred to his prize (4 pieces of writing black board cum with a chalk-like pen and eraser) as the party pack. He received a real party pack from a classmate whose birthday was on the same day, and a gift bag from his Teacher. When he opened everything, he only wanted to see what was inside and then no expressed interest in consuming the goodies. So, Mummy snug them all into my Junk Food Drawer ; ) and as usual, Kakak inherited some.

Healthy goodies from America

Gong Gong and PoPo are finally back from America after a one month stay there to welcome Uncle Julian and Aunty Winnie's firstborn, Joshua.  Oooh, he's such a handsome little fler especially in his brand new checkered shirt and matching jeans at the Photo Shoot after his full moon.

Taking advantage of free shipping within America and free shipping back to Malaysia, I have ordered some goodies in the form of organic herbs and supplements for Victoria which I cannot find here in Malaysia, nor in Singapore.  Well, at least not the brands that I ordered.  But if anyone knows of these being sold here, then pray tell, coz the next trip could possibly be a year's time (by then, I hope we don't need the Syntol probiotics)

Pure Stevia bought from here that sells stevia in the purest form without additives, chemicals or alcohol. I have searched multiple organic shops from the commercial chains to the stand-alone stores and none sell stevia. The local pharmacies here sell stevia either as a beverage sweetener which has additives or another one where the source is doubtful. I have also called up local suppliers found on the internet but found out that the manufacturer closed down.

So this is Sweet Leaf.

Their stevia come in many form, but I picked the box with 70 sachets, that cost me less than USD7 per box, and yet does not make you feel guilty for consuming. Why? Although stevia is proven to be sweeter than sugar (some webpage even claim 200-300 times sweeter), it does not come with all the bad stuff that sugar has, and is even safe for diabetics to consume.

Looking forward to being more adventurous with food recipes with Stevia.  Vic can now enjoy foods like red bean dessert (her favourite) with Stevia guilt-free and worry-free. 

Another prized order is Barleans Olive Leaf Extract (OLE).  An organic shop owner recommended OLE to me and after some research on the internet, I picked Barleans as it is fully organic and gives the impression of very high quality.  This is their webpage.

My kids simply love the OLE (yes, both of them), and although it has a natural slight bitter taste, they say it taste like honey. Just a teaspoon a day and that healed them almost immediately of the flu. The healing is much faster compared to the kids being on antihistamines and the best part is I have no guilt giving them something natural that heals from God's garden, as compared to chemicals made by men. The secret? OLE contains antioxidant 400% higher than Vitamin C (as claimed by one site) and higher than grapeseed, green tea or even mangosteen juice!    

Now my little pharmacy in my fridge can now look less alarming.  However, once my Barleans OLE is finished, I have no idea where I can replace it, as the few brands that organic shops carry locally here are not very impressive.  Anyone going or know anyone going to Australia or America soon?  : )

Vic has also started her new probiotic, Syntol that comes with this list of benefits.

I'm happy and excited for Vic, and for all who are curious about her health, she is doing great.  She has the occasional sniffy nose in the mornings and some itch now and then (especially after a few rounds of outside food) but otherwise, she is healing well - all glory be to God.